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10 commenters who probably didn't use their real name

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10 commenters who probably didn't use their real name

Image by Cross-stitch ninja.

Going through some old comments at benbarden.com, I found a few names that didn't sound particularly "normal". So I decided to look at a few of these and show you a few tips for spotting a commenter with a fake name.

1. Make Money Blogging.

I think this commenter just wanted a link to their site with "Make Money Blogging" as the keywords. I can't imagine anyone with the name "Make". Imagine the jokes...

Alternative names include:

  • Make Money Online
  • Make Loads Of Money Now
  • Make Way More Money Than Any Of The Previous People Who Left A Comment, No Really, Honest.

Basically, beware of anyone who tells you that you can make money online by sending money to them.

2. John Chow.

Not that I don't expect JC to find my blog and think "wow, this site rocks". But when "John Chow" leaves a snarky comment on a post that has nothing to do with him, it's worth digging to find out who it really is. I asked around and found out it wasn't John Chow at all.

3. Turnip of Power.

Facebook doesn't like Turnip because he doesn't use his real name. Now, I understand why Turnip's not too thrilled about that, but I did have to ask the question: is Turnip your real name?

Anyway, it turns out it's not his real name. I must say, I'm a bit disappointed by this. Social networking will never be the same again. Well, it might recover when you all find out his real name is Flash Gordon... (Flash! Aaah-aahh...)

4. Awesome.

What a name! In just one seven-letter word, it describes how great the person is while simultaneously giving out their first name. Awesome!

I'm curious though - if someone can come up with a name like Awesome when posting a comment, do you think anyone else posts comments under the alias "Useless"?

5. Alan Gay and Straight.

Alan, how can you be gay and straight? The mind boggles.

You do get some bonus points though, assuming "Alan" is your real name.

6. Lucky Emperor Casino.

Now, is this the Casino of the Lucky Emperor, or the Emperor Casino where you might be Lucky? Either way, I can imagine a dog called Lucky, but not an Emperor. It sounds made up.

7. Bad Evan.

An anagram of Bad Evan is Ban Dave. Whenever a commenter hides a message like this in their name, it can't be good. Maybe Dave would like to answer this - see #9.

8. Online Spielbank.

Spielbank - that's a play bank, right? So it's not real money? Maybe you need a tip from "Make Money Online". In the meantime, stop playing with Monopoly money.

9. Dave (The Other One).

Yep, Dave had such trouble commenting on my blog, he had to choose something other than "Dave". But imagine being called "Dave (The Other One)". Firstly, you'd have to deal with parentheses whenever typing out your name. Secondly, if you met a nice lady, you'd never be The One. You'd always be The Other One. Finally, you'd have to deal with Bad Evan and the way his name hides a subliminal message. Poor Dave. Good job it's not his real name.

10. pdyknbbh.

p...dy... kn... b... b... h... I can't even say it. And where are the vowels?!

What are the silliest commenter names you've had on your blog?

Edited to add: I don't know how on earth this happened, but I was just tweeting this post and it gave me the following URL: http://is.gd/fukc - I didn't make it up, promise!

Comments on 10 commenters who probably didn't use their real name

1
Posted by Rhys | Retro Garden on January 12, 2009

Three of my favourites have been:-

1. Africa's Ex - who linked to a porn site about african women doing it. (I thought it was quite clever, obviously digging for the keyword africa sex)

2. Famous people! Hannah Montana, Joe Cole & Lucy Pinder have all commented on my blog.

3. More Famous People! I had a commenter called Rhyse Richards. Rhyse Richards is a famous porn star I did a blog post about because I was ranking for it (my brother's name is Richard). It was #1 for that, and the genuine porn star did comment on my blog. She proved it with a photo of herself holding a piece of paper with my URL on (though she thought I'd appreciate one of her naked....I didn't). Was a fun week that week actually, though I did delete my history afterwards, for obvious reasons.

2
Posted by Ken Armstrong on January 12, 2009

Ahh! Your tweeted url is confirmation that the end of the world is nigh. Break out the seven daggers, lay them on the altar, Sam Neill is back and he's annoyed!!

Signed: Cosmo Smallpiece. :)

3
Posted by Kathy - Beyond Niche Marketing on January 13, 2009

I can't say in polite company the weirdest comment name left on my blog. Suffice it to say - it wasn't clever as in the case of Africa's ex and I didn't approve the comment.

I might have had guilty pangs marking Africa's ex as spam. That's really, really clever!

4
Posted by Bella Casa on January 13, 2009

lol, I am just glad you didn't use my commenting name...as my last name is really not House, it's pdyknbbh ;)

Bella

5
Posted by Lyndi on January 13, 2009

I do not really have commenters with strange names. I have had a WomBat but nothing else very strange.

Then of course I have regular readers who comment with names that are not their own. Web-Betty, Squeaky and fragileheart come to mind. These guys are not hiding their identity, these names are just part of their online identity. I find these quite cute in fact.

6
Posted by fragileheart on January 13, 2009

I have a commenter with a strange name but its obvious that its not his/her real name. They doen't even run a blog, they run a website for those chair lifts that are attached to stairs. I think its awesome!!

7
Posted by Alan on January 13, 2009

feh. sounds like askimet is protecting me from All the excitement. (g,d & r)

8
Posted by Alan#2 ??? on January 14, 2009

It all started way back when.....
http://www.alangayandstraight.com/2008/06/gay-and-straight.html

9
Posted by Niche on January 14, 2009

Interesting post
Odd that I have often wondered how many people believe my name is 'niche'

It's actually a nickname that I have had since childhood, was one who was said to have found my niche and it stuck.

20 years later I find it's a hot keyword

Goes to show, it's not all black and white :)

10
Posted by Deimos Tel`Arin on January 14, 2009

Well, I have taken up the name "Deimos Tel`Arin" since 1996 when I first start to play online multiplayer games such as Quake, Counter Strike etc until now.

Plus this is what my online gaming buddies refer me as so I basically treat his name as good as the name given by my parents.

11
Posted by erin on January 14, 2009

no weird commenter names here... yet.

12
Posted by Laura on January 15, 2009

pdyknbbh is that robot from Buck Rogers in the 20-whatever Century. You've probably hurt his feelings making fun of his name. Luckily he isn't likely to have a lot of feelings.

13
Posted by Ginkgo100 on January 15, 2009

Yeah, I'm going to guess that "Mr. Jobs," who left a link for a work-from-home scam on my blog, was probably not using his real name, either. He definitely did not leave me with the impression that his real identity might be the famous Mr. Jobs of Apple Corp., and the fact that he was trying to use my blog to hawk his jobs website made me even more suspicious.

14
Posted by Doe John on January 22, 2009

Nice post. I like it. Especially #9. I hate Daves.

15
Posted by BadEvan on January 24, 2009

First off, you should be honored to have me commenting on your blog, hehe.

Second, BadEvan is my pen name and my company name.

Why was I the only one to get a link-back?

oh btw, that url "http://is.gd/fukc" that's what happens when you talk smack about BadEvan...

16
Posted by Ben Barden on January 24, 2009

Thanks for the comments everyone. :)

Evan - Turnip and Alan got a link back.

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